Julia passed away on November 20, leaving behind not only her family — including her beloved daughter Gretchen, son Erich, and her husband of 57 years, Tom — but also a town she helped shape with her heart and vision. From hosting elegant dinner parties on a school night to mentoring aspiring designers across Northern California, Julia lived her life like she decorated her spaces: intentionally, beautifully, and with everyone in mind.

“She had a big personality and loved life,” Gretchen recalls. “Her family meant the world to her, and she found beauty in everything. She always wanted to make each experience beautiful, whether it was an event, a dinner, or just a conversation.”

Julia was the ultimate hostess. Friends and strangers alike were welcomed into her home, often at a moment’s notice. And when they arrived, the table was never empty — it was set with china, adorned with fresh flowers, and surrounded by people helping in the kitchen. “Our house was always full,” Gretchen says. “It could be a Tuesday night, and suddenly five couples would be over for dinner because my dad invited them after a round of golf.”

Her warmth and openness made people feel seen, understood, and cherished. That sense of inclusion wasn’t limited to her home — it extended throughout the community. Julia was deeply involved in Oakdale and beyond, fundraising for the arts, education, and various local causes over the years. She wasn’t just present — she led, organizing and supporting initiatives that brought people together.

One such lasting contribution is now in the works: an ice rink, coming to downtown Oakdale this December. What started as a serendipitous encounter — Gretchen noticing a banner downtown that reminded her of her mom’s handwriting — quickly became a meaningful way to honor Julia’s memory. Partnering with Small Town Christmas and the Oakdale Chamber Foundation, the Haidlen family gave a seed donation to help bring the rink to life.

“An ice rink brings people together,” Gretchen says. “That’s what my mom was all about. She loved Christmas, she loved Hallmark movies — she would’ve thought this was a dream come true.”

The project gained momentum quickly, thanks to community support and the powerful visibility of Julia’s legacy. It will open just a year after her passing, offering families and friends a place to create joyful memories — a fitting tribute to a woman who dedicated her life to doing exactly that.

Julia’s impact stretched beyond Oakdale. As an interior designer, she was a trailblazer — working in the Central Valley and Bay Area long before design became a trend. Her storefront on F Street, now home to 507 Day Spa, was a hub of creativity and inspiration. “She was like the women on Designing Women,” Gretchen says with a smile. “People came to her because she was the expert, and she mentored so many.”

That mentorship extended into lasting relationships. People looked up to Julia not only for her design expertise but for her kindness, her strength, and the way she made them feel like family. Many of those she mentored still speak of her as a mother figure, a lifelong friend, and an example of the kind of person they want to be.

At the heart of it all was Julia’s love for her family. Her children were her proudest achievement, and she delighted in her grandchildren, filling their time together with love and unforgettable moments. In the final years of her life, she wrote a heartfelt letter to Gretchen, which was later shared at her memorial. In it, Julia expressed the values that shaped her life: faith, family, gratitude, and finding joy in the everyday.

Her culinary gifts were another layer of her legacy. Julia’s rigatoni became famous among friends and family — a dish so beloved it was recreated and served at her memorial service. “Most people who came to our table had her rigatoni,” Gretchen says. “We have the recipe. It’s something we’ll always keep.”

Julia Haidlen leaves behind more than beautifully designed homes and cherished recipes. She leaves a legacy of love — one made visible in every life she touched, every party she hosted, every student she mentored, and every community cause she championed.

And this December, when the ice rink opens and children laugh and glide across the ice under twinkling lights, her spirit will be there too — reminding Oakdale of the joy that comes from gathering, giving, and celebrating life.